The Cascade Divide

My trip to the Seattle hospital reminded me how much the east and west sides of the Cascade range differ socially, morally, and politically. Our respective beliefs would make different states and damned near different planets.

Swedish hospital has staff from many different national and cultural groups. I enjoy talking to folks from different African, Asian, and European cultures. Oops, almost forgot Australia and New Zealand.

My first surgeon over there was a Kiwi and I had at least one Australian tech. No one from Antarctica even though one doctor walked like a penguin!

I like hearing about customs, foods, and general life in other lands.

Seattle has a lot more people from around the world but oddly enough, there were at least six staff from Africa or India in the physical rehab place in Toppenish.

One of my Seattle staff was from Wenatchee originally and said she could tell I was an East sider from the crutch holder mounted on my wheelchair. When I looked for a crutch sheath they wanted 40 bucks for a sheath with flowers that didn’t look that stout and had insufficient mounting points. What I bought was heavy duty, camo, $12.99, and had mounting points all over. Yes, it was a shotgun scabbard. You never know when you might go hunting or need to turn your wheelchair into a tactical vehicle. She and I regaled several other staff members with our bizarre and barbaric conservative customs over here for about 30 minutes. I even had to explain that Inslee and Ferguson might be their government but we didn’t vote for them.

One nurses aid asked me how many firearms I owned and I replied however many I wanted and could afford. I didn’t ask how many kombuchas she drank in a week.

One of my nurses aids started reading the website my son made for my stories and claimed to enjoy it. I guess she was chuckling about one of the stories of my exploits with Steve, and her wife asked what was so funny. She told her that there was a patient in the hospital who wrote about his childhood and despite his adventures was still alive.

I talked with 6 or 7 staff that remembered me from my 83 nights there in 2021. They didn’t perform an exorcism so I guess I’m okay.

Hunting or just shooting at targets for the heck of it is foreign to a lot of people on the west side. There has been talk of higher gas fees for those who drive farther but as per usual, things like that are west side ideas and punish us over here. We don’t have mass transit and have to drive further to different destinations.

A lot of folks over there think of Yakima as a dangerous and crime ridden place. If they met a lot of people from here they would realize it’s better than they think.

Okay, maybe we should make them think it’s worse so they quit buying up our property. Our prices, though they seem to be getting too high, look like bargains to them so it becomes property investment time. Almost every property that becomes available in our mountain areas is bought by west siders. They seem to like the warmer and dryer climate.

Seattle has been a fun place during my life but has some problems lately. A monthly parking pass downtown has a price that looks like the rent for an apartment to us. I couldn’t live stacked on top of other people. Stuck in traffic for an hour is not my idea of fun.

Every time I hear someone complaining about our traffic here I want to laugh. We don’t know what traffic is over here and I’d like to keep it that way.

West side folks and their beliefs are slowly creeping this way. Maybe we need our own border wall along the Cascade crest. Of course with the rain over there it would probably rust. Maybe threaten to stop winery and brewery tastings if they don’t leave their politics and policies over there.

There has been an idea around for years that Idaho, Eastern Washington, and Eastern Oregon should become one state called the inland empire. I’m ready to secede!

Personally I don’t care what your sexual orientation, religion, or country of origin is. Treat me right and respect our country. That’s all you need to do for me to like you. Maybe we’re a bit rough around the edges and redneck at times but on the whole, we’re good people.

To sum this up, you can have your beliefs with the stickers for your car that go with them. Just leave me alone if I start carrying a shotgun in my wheelchair scabbard. I just need one of those offroad chairs with tracks like a tank!

Just remember west side. You have the seafood and pro sports but we have the fruit, vegetables, wine, and all of the hops. No mass transit over here so make sure you drive when you come to visit. If you’re going to cover a lot of ground you might leave your electric vehicle home as well.

If the gas prices piss you off, just remember that the carbon and other taxes originated on your side. Thanks Seattle!

Long story short, there are good people on both sides of the Cascades. Just respect our beliefs and leave yours at home.

Enough of this rant. Bye.